The Truth about Stress and Overwhelm
Posted on March 28, 2011 12:00:00am, by Gerrianne Clare
This last week I hit a wall. I looked at my list of things to do and realized that about 90% of them were about 90% done.
Nothing had been fully completed.
This scattered energy was costing me not only valuable time but also my self esteem.
AND I did not recognize it immediately.
I was going about my day doing things that I normally would do yet I was not focusing fully on what was in front of me.
I would start reading emails, then I would jump to a google search. Then I would sit and try and meditate to get more focused, then I would go get a cup of tea then I would record an audio and have to rerecord it several times.
I was jumping from one task to the next and not getting anything done well. And when I did get things done the quality of the product was not up to my standards and I started to beat myself up.
Does any of this sound familiar?
In my work with clients, I see this as a classic sign of stress and have a variety of tools that I coach them in to get focused on completing one thing at a time. Yet I was not recognizing (or choosing to recognize) this in myself.
So what was up for me? In a nutshell, I don’t really have an answer. Crazy isn’t it. I spend so much of my time helping clients find their way and today I need to find mine.
I have been on a path of building my business so I can reach out and help families realize they do not need to live their lives in stress and overwhelm. There is a different way to go through life. AND I have had amazing success with my clients and am blessed to have supported them along their journey.
Yet here I am feeling stressed and overwhelmed by all that I have set out to do. I have built this business by myself while pushing through obstacles, spending lots of money, time and energy to make it happen and it has been an uphill battle. Don’t get me wrong, I have loved every part of it.
Yet today, I wonder. Am I doing the right thing? Am I making a difference? Is this a wonderful concept only in my mind and the clients I serve, or is it a business worth pursuing for the difference it can make on a larger scale?
For my one on one coaching clients, I love working with you and seeing the transformations that occur. I know that I am on the right path in the work I do with you AND this work will continue with my heart and soul.
Yet today, I wonder about the rest of you.
I have been writing blog posts, sending out emails, reaching out to my audience for over 18 months now and I wonder, is it making a difference for you? Does any of the stuff I write about make sense, do you enjoy reading it, does it offer you a different perspective? Does it help?
If you could take a minute and comment below I would really appreciate it.
Much love,
Gerrianne
Comments
Posted by Gerrianne on March 29, 2011 at 8:02:10am
Hi Kelly,
Thank you so much for the comment. I know the whole scenario of working till the wee hours of the morning to get things done and to make sure "all" aspects of my life were being taken care of.
Lately, I have been caught up in the doing of my business to try and get it to some magic level that I have lost sight of WHY I am doing this to begin with.
When I hit the wall it was a wake up call that I need to BE HERE NOW and to remember all I have is this moment. So breath work, meditation and writing have brought me some clarity and I feel more on track. However, there is still more being to be done.
Much love to you and thanks for the comment.
Posted by Kelly Okuszko on March 28, 2011 at 11:24:24pm
Hi Gerrianne,
I know all about hitting the wall. I'm a working mom who vacuums at 11pm then works on my novel and family photo albums till 2am. Just as I start to convince myself I am superwomen, I hit the wall and wind up flat out on my back or uncontrollably irritable.
I love your emails and blogs. They remind me that I am caught up in the "doing" and am missing the "being." The insights you have shown me through Heartmath and this blog have truly been life changing for my career, relationship with my hubby, mom and MYSELF.
As for "the wall" we continue to hit, I remember a line from the "Eat, Pray, Love" movie. When Liz is worried about missing her morning meditation to purse a possible love relationship, the healer in Bali says "Sometimes balance means falling off balance." That hit home for me. Even though I can never seem to keep my drive in tact and always have some low moments, those down times are ok and are just the balance I need.
I hope you have a great week!
Kelly
Posted by Mel on March 29, 2011 at 5:23:03am
Dear Gerrianne,
It makes a difference! Your thoughtful and articulate insights into the trials and tribulations of everyday life resonate, and your proposed solutions are like a blast of fresh air that dusts off the cobwebs and haze. I like that they are simple to do, and remember, from day to day. Your frequent emails and blog posts are a gentle reminder that someone special is out there actively engaged in researching and caring for our collective peace of mind and well-being. I hope you keep it up and enjoy continued success...
Posted by Brant on March 29, 2011 at 6:55:25am
Hey Gerrianne, this is the first time I have looked at your blog...You have some very interesting points. I look forward to delving into a lot of what you are saying on Friday. Regards, Brant
Posted by Gerrianne on March 29, 2011 at 8:05:25am
Mel, I am so glad to hear that my writing helps you through your day. That is my hope. Families are so incredibly stressed these days and I truly believe there is a better way and my hope is to bring a new reality to families who are hungry for more peace and connection. Much love to you and thanks for the comment.
Posted by Gerrianne on March 29, 2011 at 8:06:11am
Brant, I am glad you have ventured over to my blog. See you Friday
Posted by Dave on March 29, 2011 at 8:49:54am
Gerrianne it is only occasionally that I take a moment and read your blog. However when I do your steadfastness to your vision always inspires me in some way. I appreciate your candor in describing situations I have often found myself in and "did not recognize it immediately". Thank You for including me in your email list and I will try to be a more regular reader. You truly do make a difference. Thanks Dave
Posted by Jan on March 29, 2011 at 8:57:16am
It must be in the air, Spring time? I think we all question our path from time to time. I know I certainly do. I just came back from an aesthetics convention and life coaching was on the forefront of self development and business building. Your an inspiration to me and I use your tools for stress management all the time.
Posted by Cogi on March 29, 2011 at 9:06:32am
Hi Gerrianne,
Yes, I do read your blogs and your emails. I do enjoy them and can relate. Keep posting and keep doing what you are doing. It does make a difference. This work's rewards are in the doing it and not in the acknowledment from others that it is effective. Change takes time and it starts with seeds of information and then the transformation begins. Sometimes people are unaware how those seeds of peace and harmony landed on them. Your information is pertinent and relevant. Cogi
Posted by Darleen on March 29, 2011 at 10:45:05am
Your blogs have always prompted me to seek deeper. I have personally and professionally appreciated your commentary on living in the moment. I tend to become tied up with what I should have done in the past and what I need to do in the future. I have used your blog post to help anchor myself to "the moment".
Posted by Gerrianne on March 29, 2011 at 11:17:34am
Thanks Dave for your comments. It helps to hear how what I do makes a difference for you so I really appreciate you for letting me know. thanks again
Posted by Gerrianne on March 29, 2011 at 11:20:34am
Thanks Jan for your support. I do think there is something in the air as I know a lot of people who are in a similar space right now.
Posted by Gerrianne on March 29, 2011 at 11:31:59am
Thanks Cogi for your kind words.
I have never been one to do what I do because I want acknowledgment and kudos from others. I have a vision of families living with less stress and more balance. I know the tools I teach make a difference as I see this in the work I do with my clients whether one on one or in groups. I think my wall came from pushing so hard to make a difference that I did not see the difference that I was making. I was in the DOING of the work and lost sight of the BEING in the work. It has been an interesting week. thanks for your comments and support. Hugs
Posted by Gerrianne on March 29, 2011 at 11:36:33am
Darlene, Thanks for your kind words.
I know that stress is the biggest reason why I do not live in the moment. There are days when I spend my entire time in the future about what I need to do next. I am much better than I used to be but some days I wonder if I am any further ahead.
Then I recognize I teach what I am learning myself, it helps to ground it in me in the moment. Life is a journey.
Thanks
Posted by Katherine on March 29, 2011 at 12:46:02pm
Hi Gerianne,
I am only able to read the blogs occasionally, yet I saved all the 30 days of de-stressing series and have them ready to go at a moment's notice. Although I am an occasional reader, I enjoy your work and encourage you to keep going. You've made a difference to me - especially today when I've hit the wall myself and am reminded again to 'be' more and 'do' less.
Thanks,
Katherine
Posted by Gerrianne on March 29, 2011 at 3:02:30pm
Hi Katherine,
Thanks for letting me know. It is crazy how many people today have told me they have also hit a wall. People have been writing me emails and also commenting here and there is a lot of pain out there. I have no idea where this process is going for me, but I know that I'll keep writing as it is both cathartic and healing for me. It also makes me feel good to know that when I am going through my stuff, telling the truth about it helps people get through their stuff.
Hugs
Gerrianne
Posted by Bob H on March 29, 2011 at 3:44:54pm
Hi Gerrianne. From what I can see, and I've only looked briefly at this, but you are offering a WONDERFUL service and even your blog is filled with great advice and wisdom.
I'd ask you to keep some perspective yourself. One of the things I've really noticed, with all the social media out there today, and our 24/7, instant information society, many of us have taken on much more than we would ever have taken on, even 5 years ago. Five years ago, how many business people thought they needed a blog? Facebook presence--what's that and who needs it?? The list could go on, especially if we compared our lives with 10 or 15 years ago. Our lives have become so much more cluttered with technology and the expectations around speed and being 'always on'. I don't have a solution Gerrianne--perhaps just a gentle reminder to keep some perspective, and take some time to reflect yourself on what's most important to you, and creates the greatest benefit for others. Maybe some of the things that would be nice to do, don't need to be done today, or maybe even for another couple of weeks! See you tomorrow! Bob
Posted by Gerrianne on March 29, 2011 at 4:10:32pm
Hi Bob,
I hear you and thanks for this. This is where my re-evaluation of priorities is coming from. What is the best way, that is in alignment with my truth, to get my message out to the people who want to hear it? This is my question. I have looked at building this in a certain way and as I look at it now, it is not working as I have been doing it. That having been said, there are many places that give me joy and fill me up. I will keep those and leave the rest. I need to discern what is the best for me.
Thanks for your kind words. Take care
Gerrianne
Posted by Verena on March 30, 2011 at 2:46:46pm
Hi Gerianne!
I ahve been reading your posts through my husband. So if you wonder if your blog is being read....he reads things and passes them along....I appreciate your topics and ideas. We moved from Kamloops, so can't see you one on one, so we really enjoy your online support!
Thanks!
Verena:)
Posted by Gerrianne on March 31, 2011 at 9:30:42am
Hi Verena, Thank you so much for letting me know. Where did you move to?
I am glad you like the online support. From the feedback I have received and also from how I feel when I write, my blog is something that is going to continue.
Thanks again
Posted by Danielle on March 31, 2011 at 11:47:35am
I know from life experience that sometimes you need your down time for you too. Are you setting up time for you? Time with friends or family and or other collegues? We all need our own space out side of work to do the work we do. Also making time to do what makes us happy. Having a set nail appointment, a set monthly message, a lunch date with a friend, something to look forward to and get through our work week or month. You make a difference and you change lives. Your truly a gift to us all.
Posted by Gerrianne on March 31, 2011 at 1:32:21pm
What you say is so true. It is so important to take time for nurture me. I appreciate your thoughts and what I know I miss more than anything else is quality time with family and friends. This makes my heart sing and I see that I need to take responsibility for this to happen. I can't wait for them, I need to ask.
Thanks for your thoughts
Posted by Gretchen on April 2, 2011 at 9:16:10am
I first saw your writings on Facebook and have read some of your blogs and downloaded your very helpful session on de-stressing with the challenges within your family and your daughter's addiction. What you are doing matters, no doubt. But even if you were "only" doing the individual coaching, that would be "enough". You are enough, you are essential. We all want to be loved and to make a difference. When what you are doing makes your heart sing, then you won't feel drained or guilty. Do what you love. If the blogging is just too much, do it less or even stop it for awhile and see if you want to start again. Love yourself first and foremost. Make time for your passions, which includes your family but you have others as well: dancing? singing? painting? hiking?..... You deserve to be set free. Thank you for being you. Gretchen
Posted by Gerrianne on April 4, 2011 at 10:03:31am
Thank you so much Gretchen. There are definitely changes coming. I am ready to let go of the push and get back into the flow.
Thanks for your kind words - they struck a deep chord.
Much love,
Gerrianne